Girl... Stop Shrinking

A few nights ago, I attended a family celebration and before I left the house, I prayed a simple prayer:

"Lord, let me be a blessing."

Nothing deep.

Nothing dramatic.

Just let me be a blessing.

Well, wouldn't you know it? Before the evening was over, I was asked to pray over the meal.

Now here's where things get interesting.

When the request came, I immediately deferred.

I pointed to the pastor.

Then I pointed to another minister.

Surely one of them should do it.

Surely one of them was more qualified.

Surely one of them was the better choice.

But both of them declined.

And guess who ended up praying?

Me.

Because that's what I do.

Fast forward to the next morning.

My husband and I were talking about the event when he casually said something that stopped me in my tracks.

He said,

"Don't you know you're a pastor?"

Excuse me?

Now before you start shouting, let me explain.

It wasn't that I disagreed.

It was that I hadn't fully embraced it.

I've spent most of my life with a simple strategy:

Slide in.

Do what needs to be done.

Slide back out.

No spotlight.

No attention.

No fuss.

Just let me serve from the background.

But lately the Holy Spirit has been dealing with me.

And the truth is...

The background isn't my assignment anymore.

Whew.

That was harder to write than I expected.

Because some of us have become experts at playing small.

We call it humility.

We call it being supportive.

We call it staying in our lane.

But sometimes it's just fear wearing a church hat.

Sometimes it's insecurity dressed up as humility.

Sometimes it's worrying about what people will think if we fully embrace what God is doing in our lives.

And Sis, that's exhausting.

Here's the truth.

God didn't call me to shrink.

God didn't call me to hide.

God didn't call me to make everybody comfortable.

He called me to be obedient.

I recently heard Pastor Tolan Morgan say:

"I'm not dumbing myself down to make you comfortable."

That thing hit me right between the eyes.

Because if I'm honest, I've done that.

I've minimized.

Downplayed.

Deflected.

Explained away.

Not because I wasn't capable.

Not because God wasn't moving.

But because I didn't want to make anybody uncomfortable.

Meanwhile, God is saying:

"Daughter, I gave you that voice for a reason."

The Holy Spirit in me is bigger than my comfort zone.

And maybe that's true for you too.

Maybe you've been shrinking in rooms where God is telling you to stand.

Maybe you've been apologizing for gifts He gave you.

Maybe you've been waiting for permission from people when Heaven already said yes.

Sis, stop shrinking.

Stop hiding.

Stop apologizing for what God is developing in you.

The assignment may feel bigger than you're used to.

Good.

That's how you know you need Him.

As for me?

I'm learning to embrace who God is making me become.

Not timidly.

Not reluctantly.

Not with one foot in and one foot out.

But with joy.

With boldness.

With gratitude.

And maybe it's time for you to do the same.

Because God didn't make a mistake when He made you.

And He isn't confused about who He called you to be.

So stop shrinking, Sis.

The world has enough copies.

What it needs is the woman God created you to be.

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